Livet

Idag har man  gått på  stan. Letade Födelsedagspresent till Mor.Blev två krämer, en dag o en natt kräm. Anti rynk *s* Sen tog  man lunch med Bästa vännen =) Alltid trevligt!
Sen Begav man sig vidare o träffade en annan polare , som man inte träffat på länge! Gammal klassis!  Han känns mer som en Bror än som en vän =) Skönt o kunna ha NÅN kille o kunna umgås med!
Alla andra  killkompisar man har, bara flirtar med en. att dom inte hajjar vinken nån gång liksom! NOT INTRESTED!! Inte singel ---> upptagen---> med TJEJ! *himlar med ögonen* Get it.
 Aja... Vi åkte hem till mig ja o "brorsan" o snackade i fleera timmar, tog  några koppar kaffe... sen en öl på de =) Sen, kom hans Tjej o hämtade honom! en bra dag tycker jag!

 Sen  blev dagen snäppet ljusare då jag fick GOOODA nyheter från Goan!*Happy for you baby* Skönt att de redde ut sig=)

Nu sitter man har i sin ensamhet på kvällern, har jädrans tråkigt. Tatt mig ett litet shots glas, med Tequila Rose. Mumms!=)  Men där får de stanna för ikväll!
Nu ska jag återgå till o ha tristans trist. Hör att jag lär kila o morra lite på Leon, Han hoppar på persiennerna =(

 Vink o Hejj för ikväll!

Now getting more of a perspectiv on my life, allthough i'm only in my twenties, but as far as i'm concerned i think i'm getting a hang of it.

Getting a clearer view on things , i have always had this thick fog infront of me but i can sertanly see it all so clearer now. I dont know what or how it happened but i think i'm getting a grip on life. Of course i have my bad days too, but i think i can handle them better than i did before. Someone once told me " You dont always have to analyse everything that happens, just let it be and enjoy life as it it". Then i thought for myself , maybe i should'nt take life as serious as i always have been doing. Maybe i should take

the days as it is delivered to me.

Let faith decides what happens, because i now know that i can't predict the future. I've always been a dreamer, dreamt of things that was so far off my existing life. There is nothing wrong with having dreams, as a young child i was very happy and full of fantasis and a big dreamer at the heart. But as the years gone by, growing older, i've lost the touch of a "dreamer". Of course i still have my dreams, but it's not the same. It's not the giggeling feeling inside, and as a child i really thouht my dreams would come true, but now as we all know, the dreams we have that are so distant cant come true. Now i sound like a real pessimist, but really, i've lost it. As you grow old you start to realise reality and it's really tough! I dont want to loose the dreamer i once had in me. What have i now become?! An old dull lady?! For gods sake i'm only twenty.....plus one....

Have i lost the will to live as a dreamer? Is it wrong as an adult to have dreams? I dont know anymore and i dont have the energy to analyse that, as i said, maybe i should let it pass my way. I've always been this person full of feelings but sadly i dont know what i now have become. I'm feeling empty, cold inside and my batteries are on low. It's hard to handle it, and to know that i have to carry on to protect the thinn shall i have left. My energy is out of order. Inside everything is breaking apart, but i still have my smile to rely on, on the outside. Sometimes things are just much harder than i ever expected, then i turn my head the other way, and hope it all will go away.

I cant put up with things anymore, i've been torn down far to many times. And in my head i make up that i've got a huge massive big self-esteem. but when it comes down to it, i'm pettrefied.

I'm like this little dog with his tiny small legs , standing there, shaking til' death and his eyes is screaming for help and to be rescued. I dont know why i'm feeling this way, maybe i'm afraid of being hurt. Maybe i'm insecure of what i've got? I really dont want to loose the things that i love, the things that i fought so hard to get. It has not been the easiest road to walk through. But why is this feeling >doubt< in my head recall? I know i've made my choises in life, and i love everything i've got. But why am i so bloddy insecure of myself?? All i want to feel is safe. Anyway......

Now i've got this great life in deed and i'm happy in a way. I just wish i was'nt so mixed up with loads of feelings inside. But maybe i'll have to live with them, maybe they're just a part of who i am.

I think i am and always will be, a person full of thoughts and analyses who stands next to the litte dog ,with the shaking legs and his eyes is screaming to be rescued.

What if......

Now getting more of a perspectiv on my life, allthough i'm only in my twenties, but as far as i'm concerned i think i'm getting a hang of it.

Getting a clearer view on things , i have always had this thick fog infront of me but i can sertanly see it all so clearer now. I dont know what or how it happened but i think i'm getting a grip on life. Of course i have my bad days too, but i think i can handle them better than i did before. Someone once told me " You dont always have to analyse everything that happens, just let it be and enjoy life as it it". Then i thought for myself , maybe i should'nt take life as serious as i always have been doing. Maybe i should take the days as it is delivered to me.

Let faith decides what happens, because i now know that i can't predict the future. I've always been a dreamer, dreamt of things that was so far off my existing life. There is nothing wrong with having dreams, as a young child i was very happy and full of fantasis and a big dreamer at the heart. But as the years gone by, growing older, i've lost the touch of a "dreamer". Of course i still have my dreams, but it's not the same. It's not the giggeling feeling inside, and as a child i really thouht my dreams would come true, but now as we all know, the dreams we have that are so distant cant come true. Now i sound like a real pessimist, but really, i've lost it. As you grow old you start to realise reality and it's really tough! I dont want to loose the dreamer i once had in me. What have i now become?! An old dull lady?! For gods sake i'm only twenty.....plus one....

Have i lost the will to live as a dreamer? Is it wrong as an adult to have dreams? I dont know anymore and i dont have the energy to analyse that, as i said, maybe i should let it pass my way. I've always been this person full of feelings but sadly i dont know what i now have become. I'm feeling empty, cold inside and my batteries are on low. It's hard to handle it, and to know that i have to carry on to protect the thinn shall i have left. My energy is out of order. Inside everything is breaking apart, but i still have my smile to rely on, on the outside. Sometimes things are just much harder than i ever expected, then i turn my head the other way, and hope it all will go away.

I cant put up with things anymore, i've been torn down far to many times. And in my head i make up that i've got a huge massive big self-esteem. but when it comes down to it, i'm pettrefied.

I'm like this little dog with his tiny small legs , standing there, shaking til' death and his eyes is screaming for help and to be rescued. I dont know why i'm feeling this way, maybe i'm afraid of being hurt. Maybe i'm insecure of what i've got? I really dont want to loose the things that i love, the things that i fought so hard to get. It has not been the easiest road to walk through. But why is this feeling >doubt< in my head recall? I know i've made my choises in life, and i love everything i've got. But why am i so bloddy insecure of myself?? All i want to feel is safe. Anyway......

Now i've got this great life in deed and i'm happy in a way. I just wish i was'nt so mixed up with loads of feelings inside. But maybe i'll have to live with them, maybe they're just a part of who i am.

I think i am and always will be, a person full of thoughts and analyses who stands next to the litte dog ,with the shaking legs and his eyes is screaming to be rescued.

What if......